How to Make Out with Girls in Bars

By Dan Tolumbro

This article is geared towards newbies. I've been getting a lot more make-outs in the field lately, and it sort of snowballs. It's come to the point where I'm getting one just about every other time I go out, and while it may not further the sarge to the lay, it is good calibration experience (so you know when she's ready to be kissed), it accustoms you to intimacy with a female (The less of a big deal it is to kiss her, the easier it is to do it; same with massage and sex), and it's fun!


I'll just give one example. A while back, I was wearing my little handcuff necklace. It gets me a lot of attention, as girls ask what they mean, if I’m into bondage, etc..

I opened a 2 set weakly with the Tattoo opener. They were abrupt with their answers, but then a third girl came, and her and another girl started pulling at my necklace. I was all hands off the merchandise and saying the girls were touchy. The original two girls up and left, not liking me that much, while the third girl started asking me if I was into bondage.

At the time I said no, with an explanation, but now I realize that the best answer for that is “Yes.” I’m not into bondage, of course, but saying you are just passes a shit test because it shows you don’t care what she thinks.

So I teased her a little bit saying she was looking too into it. I pointed to the beads on her necklace and said I could assume those are anal beads. Then I started talking about her bling (a good topic I've found), about her piercings. I started qualifying her asking if any were below the belt. She said no, and then I said “Good, cause I would have to walk away right now.” I used Tyler Durden’s "You have a nice girl face but some bad girl mannerisms," which I use frequently. She said she was a nice girl, and started qualifying herself some more, saying that she wasn't nervous around me and not a bitch (I forgot why it was on topic, but it was).

She wasn't giving the do-me eyes, or touching me in any way whatsoever.. I want to reiterate there was NO KINO. But there were three IOI's (Indicators of Interest). She had stayed when her friends left, she qualified herself to me, and she kept the conversation going when it dropped. Now according to Mystery Method, that's all you need for the kiss close.

We were talking about something mundane, like jewelry or bars in the area, when I said "Would you like to kiss me?" COMPLETELY OUT OF THE BLUE. No context, no lead in.

She said "That's pretty fucking forward." I then said "Let's find out..." and moved to kiss her. She didn't move, and when my lips touched hers, she tongued me down hard core and we started making out. I pulled back after a little bit and said "See, I knew you were a bad girl." She then said "Yeah, I am, but you didn't know that before you kissed me." She then said she needed a drink and I said I'd talk to her later. Didn't talk to her again that night, was out looking at other sets. Getting a random make-out doesn't mean that much to me anymore, though it's still fun. When she left she patted me on the chest and said bye, so no buyer's remorse.

So main points:

1) Listen to Mystery on this one. Just ask "Would you like to kiss me?" after 3 IOI’s. Just ask out of the blue.

2)These can be any 3 IOI's. She doesn’t have to be touching you, gazing at you, or even close to you, in order for her to be ready for you to kiss her

3)No matter what her response is, if it's anything other than yes/no, you are required to say "Let's find out" and kiss her. I give you permission to refrain on ethical grounds if she says "I have a boyfriend/married" but that's it.

4)Don't assume the tongue-down will turn into a lay, or even a number. This is for skills-et improvement/fun primarily. One night stands are possible though through this technique

5)The make-out is NOT HARD to get. Once you get a few in a month you'll wonder what all the fuss was about getting that first kiss.

6)Lastly, be willing to fuck this up multiple times. Try it early in the sarge, middle, and late. Try it with drunk girls, sober girls, etc.

One thing that worries guys is “What if she says no?” Or, “What if she turns her head when I try to kiss her.” I’ll tell you one thing, in bars and clubs, girls are unbelievably forgiving for a failed kiss close. They don’t get mad if you go for it and they aren’t ready. What DOES make them mad if you go for it, don’t get it, then leave. In my earlier days I made quite a few women mad by leaving too soon. Then I started sticking around, and often they would start touching me more after I went for it, since they saw I wasn’t too wrapped up in the outcome. I’ve actually kissed a few girls who weren’t ready for it and made contact, and even though they pulled back, they weren’t upset at all. One actually had her boyfriend come back 30 seconds later and she didn’t call me on it or anything.

This can be bad news, but women tend to take kissing far less seriously than you do. A lot of women have kissed literally thousands of guys in their day. Some do it every week at the clubs, and think nothing of it. If you ask a girl when’s the last time she kissed a guy, she might say “Oh, four months ago.” Then you can ask her how many including the times she was on vacation or drunk, and she’ll say “Oh, that doesn’t count!”

The more you make the kiss out to be, the harder it will be to get it. If it’s some important goal, you’ll be much more nervous about getting it. If it’s a baby step along the way in a seduction, then it’s really no sweat. If you don’t care, she won’t care. Eventually, often rapidly, you’ll develop “kiss intuition,” which is this barometer in your mind that lets you know exactly when she’s ready to be kissed. It’s nothing logical in your head, you just feel it. After developing kiss intuition, I could sometimes make out with a girl within 20 seconds of meeting her, as I was still introducing myself and shaking her hand.

For more information on this topic, I definitely recommend click here for Swinggcat's ebook which goes into more advanced kiss closing strategies. 

As for kiss-closing on dates, David DeAngelo has the best tactic for that.  Click here for more.